Poor pronunciation

It’s rare these days, but I still have “I grew up without TV/media influence and don’t know how to pronounce anything because I only read” moments.

Case in point, last night I said something to the effect of “… to assuage your guilt,” but pronounced “assuage” as if it rhymed with “mirage.”

Matt, quite literally, did not understand. I repeated myself, and after he finished laughing at me (a good five minutes worth) he said, “That’s not how you pronounce it—it’s ‘aswaaage.’”

The word sounded so foreign, I knew I had never heard it aloud (at least not in context that allowed me to connect it to the spelling).

Not one to take such a challenge to my intellect lightly, I researched the matter on my lunch hour today.

While I am happy to report that my usage was correct—”to lessen the intensity of (something that pains or distresses)”—my pronunciation was terrible. It is indeed “ə-ˈswāj.”

Am I embarrassed? Not really. In fact, I’m proud when I’m this far off. It connects me to my roots, reminding me of Saturdays spent reading in the Seattle rain (indoors, of course).